What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Why do guys look up TikTok girls instead of porn? My boyfriend of two years, looks up big boobs on TikTok. He has never once cheated on me, not on social media or IRL. He claims it’s to “get off real quick if I’m not home.”

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

TEXT:

What timeless pieces do you believe every wardrobe should possess?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Why does the God of the Bible condemn homosexual acts?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Isn't it great that we have an incoming president who is embracing ideas from the past like manifest destiny? Isn't it greater that Trump is willing to get us more territory and land?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Jennifer Garner Celebrates Ben Affleck on Father’s Day with Throwback Photo of Him Cuddling 1 of Their Kids - AOL.com

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Make Nazis afraid again!

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Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

What's an uncomfortable truth you've learned to accept?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Do you find Anushka Sen attractive?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Thinking from a spiritual perspective, can we say that the journey in recovering from narcissistic abuse a battle of spiritual warfare? Any thoughts on this?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Are democrats inherently stupid or just lazy? They can Google " Ohio is investigating reports by residents that migrants are eating the local wildlife " why can't they seem to do the most simple things? Blind, ignorant, stupid or obtuse?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Can you share any "backstage pass" experiences you have had at concerts?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.